No One Gets Better Alone
If you’re a friend you know that in the winter months, my sport is basketball. Especially college ball, given I live in the same market as NC State, Duke, and UNC-Chapel Hill.
Years ago, when my father came to terms that his eldest son would never play sports, he suggested that I officiate my uncle’s team’s basketball scrimmages. That was appealing to an insecure 15-year old because I was told I’d have a whistle and the other kids had to listen to me. I caught the referee bug so, for the last three decades, I’ve officiated high school basketball as a side hustle.
Many years in, I wondered why I never got the brass ring: an invitation to call a state championship. After all, I’d done my time and thought I was pretty good. When was it my turn? And why did I keep hearing about others getting that accolade, but not me? Voicing this to a fellow official, he wondered out loud if I was mature enough to get an honest answer. Expecting him to simply affirm my perspective, I was trapped and had to say yes. He recorded me at several games and then showed me the video (an aircheck, if you will). Who was that overweight guy running up and down the court, I wondered? Who’s that guy out of position on his calls? It was me, and I had lots of work to do to get better, if my goal of a state championship was to be realized.
In the many years since, and reflecting on the work I now do in radio, one thing has become apparent – no one gets better alone.
Everyone says they want to improve. Very few are willing to do the two things improvement requires.
First, you must look inward. Not casually. Not defensively. But honestly.
That means admitting there are parts of your craft that are average, habits that are comfortable, and blind spots you can’t see on your own. Self-awareness is the starting point, but it’s not enough.
Real improvement happens when you invite a small, trusted circle into your process—people who care more about your growth than your feelings. Not cheerleaders. Not critics with an agenda. Professionals who can give you unbiased, dispassionate feedback.
These are the people who will tell you: “That works… but it could work better.” “You’re leaning on the same moves again.” “You’re good—but you’re capable of more.”
That kind of feedback stings a little. It should. Growth usually does.
The mistake most people make is crowdsourcing opinions or avoiding feedback altogether. Both are comfort plays. Neither leads to mastery.
If you’re serious about improving, build your small circle. Listen without defending. Apply what fits. Discard what doesn’t. Repeat and get better.
Progress isn’t about talent. It’s about humility, trust, and the courage to let others sharpen you.
I belong to lots of referee Facebook groups and am always learning when I watch a posted video or they engage their followers in a philosophical conversation. Paul Diasparra, an official who runs one of them, recently said this. I’ve changed the parts about officials, so it resonates with you:
“If there’s one message you take into your future, let it be this: getting no feedback is the anchor that slows your growth. Too many of us spend time looking sideways, comparing ourselves to peers, measuring progress against others, wondering why someone else moved up faster or got an opportunity sooner. Others spend time looking upward, too focused on talent who are where they wanna be. They compare timelines, they compare paths, and it often breeds insecurity, doubt, and the feeling of being left behind. And then there’s looking downward when you’re comparing yourself. Maybe comparing yourself to someone who’s earlier on their journey. That doesn’t lead to growth either because it creates a false sense of confidence, feeds the ego, and distracts from the work that’s still required. None of those directions help you improve. The direction that matters most is looking inward. Your career is your story, your pace, your lessons, your setbacks, your breakthroughs. None of it is meant to look like anyone else’s. So, when you focus inward on your preparation, your habits, your mindset, and your effort, that’s where the real growth begins.”
If we’re going to stay relevant as an industry, we all know the power of talent. But we have a smaller margin for error than we once did because of the amount of competition for the attention of listeners.
If you don’t have anyone you trust or can lean on to help you with this, holler at me and I’ll be on your team. I want nothing for it except that you pay it forward to others in our industry so they can improve, too.
Because no one gets better alone.

Some nights while eating dinner, I have no appetite on TV for the political shout-fests or sports round table know-it-alls. So, I keep clicking until I hit gold: a rerun of Everybody Loves Raymond. A show that hasn’t been on the air in 20 years but always delivers the laughs.
Who are the characters on your show? They must, must, must be grounded in the truth. The difference between your characters and those on Everybody Loves Raymond is that yours are real (the TV characters are assigned to great comedic actors). You cannot give a persona to someone on your show – they’ll be inauthentic and the audience will sense it. Apply this exercise above to your cast then ask where the tension is and how they are different.
But not my Carrot Weather. It has attitude and edge, and it almost always makes me laugh because it’s topical. And it curses at me. Where I’m blah on all the above, this app entertains me while I’m getting the weather information. As a result, I don’t shrug my shoulders at Carrot. Even its name is different from all the above. What do carrots have to do with the weather? Nothing! I’m loyal to it because of these differences, and gladly pay their $30 yearly fee because I (we?) need more laughter in our lives.

I get bored in Umstead Park, right by my house. I leash up Willow Two Toys® and Sam the World’s Neediest Dog® and we go for a walk. No phone, no music, no headphones, no disruptions. I turn the “gotta figure this out” dial down to zero. Only nature and my wandering mind. And what enters my brain when I invite in some boredom are solutions to challenges, ideas, and ways to innovate I didn’t have when I was filling that boredom with an endless search for something to solve it.
I don’t profess to have any super creative abilities. But I have found, when I create that brain space by walking through the park, things magically happen. I don’t know why and can’t predict when, but it happens. We don’t do enough of that. As an example from last week, we have a holiday concert at one station and the morning show has 100 tickets to give out. Instead of doing pairs of tickets so lots of listeners win, or the dreaded Family Four Pack (someone kill this, please), the walk through the park brought me the idea to give all 100 tickets to one listener. The morning show promotion Deck Your Doors was born in the park because of the boredom. The talent and brand manager loved it and now we have something that’ll make our show stand out.
So, I’m here to say go be bored. Find a park, let your feet touch grass figuratively, leave the phone behind, and let your mind wander. If you’re one of my on-air talent, try this weekly and watch what happens to your creativity.
I recently decided to add to the boredom menu. I bought a bike. While my friends all have bets on when I’ll end up in the emergency room, I’m betting that the boredom of the rides, with no phones or distractions, will unlock more of my curiosity. A few days ago, the boredom of a ride brought me the idea for this blog.
Human beings gravitate to routine and structure. The Bert Show on Q100 in Atlanta has been a part of that for decades. And poof, one day soon, it will go away. What will happen to his massive, loyal following in Atlanta and across his network of stations? However the station handles this moment could determine its success for many years.
I suggested we go on a long walk one morning for charity. That became Kennedy’s Wicked Long Walk. Kennedy just did her second walk and, in one day, raised over $70,000 for Samaritans, a local charity that serves young people who are challenged with mental health issues. Kids and mental health are the show’s causes, with the latter being important to Kennedy, as she’s been quite open with the audience about her mental health.
I’m not one for metrics but let me share some impressive numbers. Over $70,000 donated from more than 700 individual donors in one day. Samaritans provided to Kennedy the donor list and she wrote a thank you to every single one of them. She shared where their money was going and what it meant to her that they cared enough to help. Can you imagine how it felt for those who gave to hear from her?
This show gets the big and small stuff – they do things with relevant content that create wonderful experiences in the moment and big things that cause talk and keep them top-of-mind. Kennedy’s Wicked Long Walk is a new tradition for the show that asks listeners to help join forces for a cause that’s important. It’s a bold, different way to give fans a chance to do so, too. In turn, that deepens the bond – the connection- between Karson, Kennedy, and their Producer, Dan.
Let’s help you move from the former season to the latter. Let’s talk about two areas that help you get there: the money and the culture in your building (how you’re perceived). I’m not suggesting you’re not doing any of this or haven’t tried, but take these as reminders of ways you can become even more valuable in the building.
If you said it was resting comfortably at a zero, I’d get it. I’m Steve Reynolds and even I don’t care. And yet I listen to some personalities who think telling me that this is National Pest Control Week or today is National Doughnut Day is content. It isn’t, because it’s irrelevant to listeners’ lives.
I’m turning over the blog this week to one of the smartest people in radio. Jim Ryan consults, coaches talent, and is one of my closest friends. After nearly thirty years programming day-to-day in New York City for immensely successful brands like WLTW, CBS-FM, and WNEW-FM, along with growing national formats for Clear Channel, CBS, and Audacy, Jim felt it was time to take control of his future, so he’s stepped out on his own. Jim not only teaches me in every conversation, he makes me laugh out loud, too. Reach him at jim@jimryanmedia.com. Ladies and gents, Jim Ryan…
When radio played an original version of one of her songs (the ones owned by the guy she didn’t like), the request lines lit up immediately with Swifties telling the talent they needed to play her new versions. Companies like iHeart and Audacy moved to the new versions, mapping another Taylor win. The streaming services saw immediate results as well – Taylor’s new versions were crushing the originals in airplay. It all led this summer to Taylor buying back the original masters at a somewhat reasonable price.
Early August brings the tradition of the Morning Show Bootcamp. This year in Austin. A few hundred personalities who believe in radio gather to improve, grow, and network. As I reflect on the many I’ve attended, there’s one thing always missing that you should know. Before I reveal that, an admission…
Living in Raleigh, I became a Duke fan and Coach K had written a book in 1999 called Leading with the Heart. I re-read it last week and its message of leadership is more salient now, given where we are in the industry. It might be the single best book I’ve ever read on leadership. I quote it often and always note what Coach K preached is why Duke always wins.